Tuesday, April 15, 2014

5 February 2014 at 23:13

Andrea has had a bit of a burning pain. She needs you to stop hurting her. This is going to take a little while. We don't need to go back to the very beginning. We know there is a problem. Andrea has needed to assert herself. This is a very difficult thing to do. This isn't as complicated as it seems. It would seem that Andrea hurts a lot and it's about time for her to have a change. We are about to change her life and this will be a better arrangement.


'It really wouldn't have been such a smart idea.'


Andrea is glad that all of this has happened. It taught her something. No longer does she need the art crowd. They have taught her about what she doesn't want to be. You can be a part of an art crowd or you can be an independent artist. Andrea would rather separate herself from the group. It would be what she would want. This isn't a place for her and she needs them to leave. They have left her profile and none of the remaining really worry her. We have told her who to delete. We want to tell her a little bit more. We know Andrea has wanted to know a few things and she will wait patiently for us to tell her. We are going to tell her quite slowly because it isn't something that is going to happen overnight. Andrea will need to know a few things and we are making a major shift. We have accomplished quite a great deal over the past couple of months. Andrea would say that life has greatly improved. There has been one problem and Andrea has figured out how to fix it. She has finally figured out how to fix it. This would be to listen to me and not worry so much.


'I really want it to be that she's a stupid person.'


This is one of those things that hurts people. There will be a lot of judgments and we always know that. This will get better. This energy is finally going away. Some people might seem nicer than they are. Sometimes we need to eliminate people who don't really seem that bad. This would be because they gossip a lot and this is a malicious thing. This isn't seeming as nice as it was. it's seeming like an insincere thing. This is something to truly look out for. Sometimes the most hurtful people are nice to your face. Sometimes you really want to believe that somebody is nice. Andrea has come across that in her life. She would remember when the neighbor started abusing his wife. Andrea really didn't want to believe it was true. She really didn't want to have her illusion shattered. She really didn't want to believe this was happening. She wanted to pretend for a while that it wasn't really a bad thing. She wanted to ignore when she noticed the red flags. He began talking about some of his experiences and some of it began to make Andrea wonder.


'I really hate the fact that you are this intuitive.'


He began to talk about going to anger management. At first it seemed like a very interesting story. At first it seemed like a good story, but Andrea began wondering about a couple of things. His daughter never came to visit him. He said his daughter hadn't been around in years. Andrea would think that would indicate something very negative and it did. It did. It did. It suggested that his daughter didn't really like him. His daughter wasn't wanting to see him. This would be very unusual for a girl in her 20s when the mother had passed away.


'I really don't want to think about it.'


Andrea had noticed a couple of other things. Andrea had noticed that there was a lot of angry energy. She noticed that everybody seemed enraged. It was like everybody was absorbing his anger. It seemed like he would provoke a big argument and people wouldn't even suspect it.


'I really don't want to think about it.'


You will want to think about it for a second because Andrea remembered something. Andrea heard a little voice crying.


'Help!' was what Andrea had heard.


And it was a soft little girl voice. It sounded very frightening and Andrea was very alarmed by it. She heard this voice inside her mind. it's very difficult to explain what these things sound like.


'Hearing voices?'


This isn't usually a good question to ask a person. But, we would joke about it. A lot of occultists hear voices and Andrea wouldn't want somebody on her friends list who is very closed about that. Andrea would rather have people who are pretty open-minded and she has encountered a lot of occult phenomenon in her life. It's a trouble to have this person interfere because it affects what Andrea writes. We have deleted a whole number of people. I have told Andrea who to delete.


'I want it to be that she's not really very intelligent.'

This is how annoying Monica would be. It wouldn't be very worthwhile to be friends with that whole crowd. Andrea doesn't have any problems with the art community itself. We have gone through something and it is over. We have removed all of the destructive people from this list. There really aren't too many people from that community left to remove. None of the ones remaining are going to interfere. Interference is what we are worried about.


'I want it to be that it's a bad person.'


Andrea isn't really that bad and she can't take anymore of their energy. It was okay for a while, but it's time to move onto better things. These people will be too cynical about Andrea to let her comfortably express herself. They want to judge her based on her body. Her background is another thing they will judge. Let's just say that it wouldn't be very empowering to have their consciousness mixed with her's. They aren't going to be happy to be kicked off of this whole list. They will want to assume that Andrea is angry, but she has just cleaned up her entire list.


Anger. And it would be a foreign anger. It isn't Andrea's anger and these people are too busy diagnosing Andrea to allow her to completely express what is going on. That would be one of the big problems. Cutting in on a person's idea before they have completed it. Andrea knows that if you cut in on a sentence right in the middle it can completely have a different meaning. Listening to the first half of a sentence and making an opinion is not a good idea, yet a lot of us do it all the time. Especially if the idea at the beginning triggers a memory.


'I want it to be that Andrea hates us. I want it to be that Andrea hates us. I want it to be.'


We need to talk about a few things that have occurred over the past few year. But, we don't want these people here to judge it. These people aren't very objective about women and they want to think women delude themselves. These people want to think Andrea is deluding herself . They don't understand what's going on. Andrea is unable to move on because she is having a burning perception. This has been an endless source of frustration for Andrea and it would be very insulting. It implies that she is an ugly woman who is naively chasing after a man. Andrea really hates this whole experience, but can't do anything about the weird intrusions. This would involve a lot of physical pain and she does experience extreme pain. I want to talk about this right now because it's not what you think it is. She doesn't have anything wrong with her on a physical level. Andrea has a blockage in her heart chakra and it is to do with her mother. Andrea's mother has hurt her very much and this makes it very hard for Andrea to love herself. Andrea's mother is very hurtful. Andrea would have to feel guilty about it.


'I really wish I hadn't done this.'


Now, we have a woman who is doing almost exactly the same thing Andrea's mother does. Andrea's mother blames Andrea for everything and never gives her credit for anything good she does. Her mother doesn't appreciate anything nice she does. Last Christmas was the prime example. Andrea bought her mother lots of presents and had expected to have a nice Christmas. But, her mother was not very nice to her and did something very upsetting. Her mother started bring up her ex-boyfriend and wanted Andrea to feel really crappy. It was almost like it was punishment for losing weight. her mother needed to burden her with guilt, so she brought up Andrea's ex-boyfriend. A boyfriend Andrea had broken up with 14 years early. This made Andrea realize how much damage her mother has inflicted. It was at this point that Andrea realized how much damage had been done. This woman wanted to make her only daughter feel guilty on Christmas for breaking up with somebody 14 years earlier. She did this at a point when Andrea had a lot of stress in her life and she worded it in a very hurtful way.


'Did Simon ever tell you to get the fuck out?' her mother had asked.


Andrea had answered that he had not and her mother made a little joyful sound. She made a joyful sound to show what a great boyfriend he had been for not putting Andrea out on the streets. Andrea's mother is not a very nice woman. Andrea has had to spend 37 years with this parent. This has been a very painful relationship, but Andrea would like to pretend that it isn't. She would like to pretend that it isn't. This is one of the most depressing things about it. Andrea tries to say nice things about her mother. Andrea tries to give her mother credit. And then what happened on November 30th. Andrea had a complete meltdown because this Monica woman was sending Andrea lots of volatile psychic energy. Andrea has noticed that she will sometimes feel a little bit of relief if she starts talking about her childhood. It will feel like Monica lets go of giving her pain the moment Andrea starts talking about how depressing her childhood was. Andrea really hates sympathy from people and would rather be proud of what she's done. Just keep on crapping on a human being and don't want to give anybody any credit. They don't want to say 'Hey! That was hard!'. They don't want to say 'Hey! You've been through a lot!'. They don't want to just leave you alone. They can't just let you sit and cry. They have to torture you on top of it. And it is often like this. It is often that shitty. People do not want to be nice. Not even when you have a nervous breakdown. If you are a smart woman they will gloat about. People like a sob story better than a happy ending and they'd rather a person suffer their whole life. Well, that would be how it would seem. But, we are going to change all of that. We are going to take away all of the people who are fastening her foot to the stone. That's a Leonard Cohen lyric and it's about being dragged down.

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